angie posted this on friendster's bulletin, just though of sharing this with all frenz that i know and do not know:
There was an email a few years back circulating around about relationship being like a piece of blank paper.
Both of you start with a clean sheet of paper and initially both of you will be happily writing a story on it. Over time, one may be tired and write less and the other party has to put in effort and fill in the space. Sometimes, it might be the other way round and one party have to compromise or give in or put more effort to ensure the words keep flowing. If either one party chooses to stop writing or chooses to write on another piece of paper, the story just can't go on. It's as simple as that.
One weakness of us gals is our tendency to be too analytical and "calculative". Eg, "I put in this much and much into this relationship, he should love me this much much.!"
And when the relationship ends, we'll be mourning and pondering over all our efforts and time spent on the guy, what we did wrong, why is she better than me and how can he leave me when i did so much and sacrifice so much for him!
Love is not an equation where a+b=c , or in love terms, what you put in should be matched by the amount he puts in as well.
Guys understand that and are more practical. When a relationship doesn't work out, they are able to let go and are just eager to find a replacement so that life will goes on as usual and they don't have to suffer the pangs of loneliness , still have a companion and a warm body in bed.
While girls will be burdened with the all the " Whys Whys whys" and deep analysis from the beginning of the relationship to end, and why and where it has gone wrong. We are not able to accept the reality that we placed our chips on the wrong bet and instead, waste more of our precious time analysing and mourning on a matter that is already a fact, which doesn't serve any purpose at all.
Haven't seen any cases of a guy turning back cos he's touched by the fact the gal he ditched is mourning and waiting for him. If he does turn back, most likely is the new gal ditched him or the pasture is just not as green as he thought it was, and he's just grazing back at your pasture till he finds what he thinks is a greener one. ( in that case, why do you need this kind of guy for?)
Learn to be more light hearted and with less expectation in love. If you are together with someone you love/like and the feeling is mutual, enjoy the relationship as it goes along. But don't put all your eggs in one basket and expect a lifelong of undying love and declaration.
Things change, people change. He and you will change as time goes along. If both of you are not changing in the same direction, both of you won't be on the same highway to the same destination.
Always love yourself and take good care of yourself.
If you don't even love yourself, how do you expect other people to love you?
I love this message v much, i think it reflects v much on what things in bgr realli is... as for me, i'm blessed... i've everything that i can ever ask for... a feeling that i have nv felt b4 in my life..
Baby, i love u!
